Some people may get confused about the real meaning of self-esteem. Some people want to be more intelligent than they actually think they are, some people hate their bodies and some other people do not love their behavioral aspects or are feeling bad because do not accomplish some goals or targeted objectives.
As a definition of self-esteem, you certainly know that it is the set of feelings of love, self-worth and capability you have towards yourself. If your self-esteem has been taking hits, how do you give it a much-needed boost?
If you do not know why you are having a lowering self-esteem, try to consult what can actually be the situations that may cause low self-esteem.
Increase Your Self-Esteem Starting From Your Inner Allies
Why are you fighting yourself? People with high self-esteem have more inner allies than inner enemies, they direct their inner resources to focus on more positives than negatives. They do this by having:
Instead of having inner voices that discourage themselves, they have inner cheerleaders.
They foster and build beliefs that help them have hope for the future, a sense of capability and responsibility, and a sense of self-worth and belonging.
Important Steps To Increase Your Self-Esteem And Give It A Boost
Here’s a technique to give your self-esteem a boost. Set everyday at least 10 minutes (or more if you believe to take more time to do these steps) of uninterrupted time for yourself to do the following actions:
1) Appreciate Yourself
Take a paper or a computer laptop and start to write. Imagine looking at yourself from the point of view of someone who loves you. Pick someone in your life whom you know that absolutely loves you. Look at yourself from his/her eyes, hear yourself from his/her ears and feel what he/she feels about you from his/her most loving place. Write about you from this person’s point of view. Write about yourself in the third-person. Write about what this person loves most about you, why, and all the wonderful things he/she notices about you that you don’t pay enough attention to.
If you think this process may be difficult, try to ask yourself the following question: what are the things I can congratulate myself for? Then write down two or three or four reasons that could make you appreciate yourself. These things do not have to be great and giant things, but little actions. If you helped someone with your speeches or made someone laugh in times of trouble, then these are good actions.
Maybe you are a person with a great heart, a caring and helping person.
If you take this exercise every day, you will see in few weeks your mood improving. And you will understand that people may need the little actions that you do in order to help them.
2) Forgive Yourself When You Make Mistakes
Be your own internal cheerleader. Everybody makes mistakes, but a person with low self-esteem tends to hold the blame longer and rake themselves over far too much. A person with high self-esteem recognizes that everybody makes mistakes, it’s better to learn from it and move on.
You do not have to criticize always yourself, you have to shut your inner critic up. Stop this inner critic or it will increase your negative thoughts more and more. This is a very important step in order to increase your self-esteem. The best exercises you could give are the following:
- Say STOP whenever this kind of criticizing thought or voice comes up.
- Refocus Your Mind On Something More Productive. What projects you have to do for tomorrow, or what meals you have planned to eat this evening, or what will be your next life goal.
This will motivate yourself a lot.
3) Reward Yourself
Notice when you do good things and give yourself points for them. A person with low self-esteem notices more negatives and ignores the positives about herself than someone with high self-esteem. I think this is the most important tip in order to really start your process of increasing self-esteem.
Everyone has good and bad behaviors and aspects. Whichever you choose to give your attention, it will grow and the more you focus on your own unique positives, the higher you’ll esteem yourself. Know that you’re a capable person who deserves all the happiness you want. Even if you don’t feel like that at the moment, it’s not because you’re not, it’s because you haven’t discovered yet just how you are.
4) Be Kinder And Caring About Other People
This step is really fundamental. Why? If you start to care and be kind towards people surrounding you every day (your colleagues or your parents or your roommates), you will then start to be kind and caring even towards yourself. You will notice this change and the people surrounding you will too! Indeed they will start to be caring and kinder towards you!
I can suggest you to have a deep look at the steps you have to follow if you want to be Great and pursue Greatness In Life. In that article are written some important things about how being great with other people, and you can take it as reference regarding this important step to increase your self-esteem.
5) Start To Use Motivational Habits
As described before, you should avoid situations that may lower your self-esteem; but, what are the habits you should follow in order to increase your self-esteem? I can definitely suggest you to follow these two healthy habits:
- Remind yourself of the benefits you will get by following the exercises listed above. Write all the things you want to do, all your goals. This will motivate yourself a lot. Write about your travels you want to do by saving your moneys or the gift you want to give to someone you love
- Refocus on things that you really want to do. Not Focus on things that annoy you or that are not relevant. Do not waste time on things that you do not like. If you like basketball instead of studying boring things about the Greek Philology, dedicate yourself to basketball. In this case you have to have the smartness to choose what field of interest you love more. If you love basketball but you think you cannot become the new Michael Jordan, start something that is related in some way with basketball: try to open a store, try to follow a subject about becoming a basketball trainer, or whatever is related. The most important thing is that you focus on what you like to do.
Regarding generally the habits environment, I can suggest you to try this strategy about giving up bad habits and start good ones.
Why It Is Important To Have A High Self-Esteem?
If you are on your road to build a good level of self-esteem, these are the reasons that should convince you to maintain it stable:
- Things Become Easier. Your life will become easier and simpler too. You will notice your problems reducing and you will give importance only to things that matter.
- You Will Improve The Opinion Of Yourself. Things will become easier because your inner situation will too. You will worry less about what may think other people and this will make you more serene and calm.
- You Will Feel To Deserve Better Things. This will improve your expectations and will motivate you a lot. You will start to set SMART goals and then you will reach a good part of them.
- You Will Become Stable. This stability will improve your relationship with people and your strength to overcome difficult times.
- You Will Let Your Bad Beliefs Go. You will find more motivation and willpower to face tasks even if they seem hard or impossible. Having negative beliefs is really self-sabotaging.
- You Will Definitely Be Happy. And that’s really great.
Other Resources That May Interest You:
- Best Suggestions To Improve Yourself (Personal Development)
- How Can I Manage My Anxiety Attacks?
- Start A Morning Routine To Definitely Change Your Life
- How To Stop Worrying
- Tips For Fighting Depression